A short list for my landlord

My landlord is super great but emailing him about problems in my apartment always makes me nervous for some reason. So I’m hoping he’ll just find this here and save me the trouble.

1. The wall in the bathroom is falling. Does that make sense? I don't know how else to describe it, but it would be definitely be great if you could come look at it.

2. Also the faucet water sprays sideways instead of down. I know this seems more in the realm of a physicist than a landlord but I thought I’d tell you about it to see if there’s anything you can do.

3. One of the heaters doesn't turn on. This barely made the list because

4. the other heater won't turn off. So that sort of evens things out. Ignore this part of the list please.

5. There’s something horribly wrong with my freezer - I’ll put an entire brand-new container of ice cream in there and it's gone within hours.

6. I still notice the same number of spiders, and that’s great, but lately they seem - less spidery. Like they're not making webs with the same zeal they used to. 

7. This one involves the windows. They used to stay light until at least eight, sometimes even nine, and lately they’re not working at all. Yesterday it was completely dark by six, which seems insane and obviously extremely urgent.

8. I got new dark-wash jeans and they stained the tops of my white tennis shoes blue.

9. Sometimes, at the bus stop or in the elevator or line at the grocery store I’ll say something to a stranger but a bit too quietly, and I think my voice blends into the air around us and they don’t respond. I don’t know if they’re ignoring me or if I need to say it again louder. I think I just need to say it again louder, but I wish I knew for sure.

10. There is a cat in the neighborhood with thumbs. Have you ever seen a cat like that? It’s beautiful, I’m obsessed with it. I don’t have any photos because it’s so blurry (not in real life, just in photos) but here are some other cat thumbs.