After fifteen years of off-and-on practice, I finally learned to blow bubbles with bubble gum last week and have not stopped since. Besides a super-muscular jawline, I've also gained an interest in every single variety of bubble gum. Have you gained an interest how the most popular six brands stack up using a very complicated and unexplained rating system? Today is your lucky day.
Bubble Yum Original
This is the very best. I think it tastes delicious. The pieces are the size of a small hamburger which seems way too big at first but ends up being just right and so easy for blowing bubbles: both the smooth matte kind and the clear shiny kind that look like pink soap bubbles. I think the difference depends on how long you've been chewing it, but I'm not sure because I'm still sort of new at this.
bubbles:⚫⚫⚫⚫⚫
taste: ⚫⚫
packaging:⚫⚫
Hubba Bubba Bubble tape
Bubble Tape tastes like flour even though the ingredients actually consist of eight different types of sugar, also misleading because it doesn't taste even close to as sweet as all the other kinds. You tape-measure out three times the amount you think you would need and after about a minute, when it tastes like chewing on a band-aid, you can blow a few really sad bubbles.
bubbles:☹
taste:⚫
packaging:⚫⚫
Orbit Bubblemint
I tested this and then forgot about it so I'm kind of guessing on these numbers. Average? I wondered at first if Bubblemint was a flavor of gum instead of a bubble gum, but it is bubble gum. End of review.
bubbles: ⚫?
taste: ⚫?
packaging:⚫
Trident Bubblegum
Just the worst. I can't blow any bubbles with Trident, and end up making weird wet spitting noises. It also makes you feel sort of sick if you chew it on an empty stomach. And who has time for eating when there are so many types of bubble gum to test-drive? Unfortunately Trident was 2-for-the-price-of-1 when I went of my gum-buying-spree so I have so much of it, but fortunately I've found cutting it with a slice of Extra makes blowing bubbles way easier.
bubbles: ☹
taste: ☹
packaging: ☹
Ice Breakers Ice Cubes Bubble Breeze
Not even the square plastic container or the sparkly illustration of a gum-cube with a mint leaf or the fact that these look like soap-colored rocks with little blue flecks prepared me for how completely disgusting this would be.
bubbles: unknown, couldn't survive taste
taste: ☹
packaging: ☹
Extra Classic Bubble
Does "extra" imply that the flavor lasts extra-long? Nevermind I just checked the package and it says exactly that. In real life Extra flavor fades extra-fast, which is perfect because you can't blow bubbles until all the taste is gone anyway. I think the bubbles are even better than Bubble Yum, which at this point is really only in the lead because of the cool-looking duck on the package. Also I Extra tastes sort of like medicine, but I don't know what tastes like anything anymore.
bubbles: ⚫⚫⚫⚫
taste: ☹
packaging: ⚫
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